Tuesday, November 23, 2010
wow! so, we actually made it this far. the doctors didn’t think i would make it to 35 weeks, but after almost 5 weeks of laying in a hospital bed i am one day away from being sent home. this is the eve of my hospital release!
in honor of such a big day, i decided to post some pictures of my stay here and to share some of my observations and thoughts on hospital bed rest when pregnant with twins…
this is me in my hospital bed 4 days ago (34 weeks + 2 days)
- my first observation is that i am HUGE! look at that belly!!
- my second observation is that the nurses have been lying to me!! I SEE STRETCH MARKS!!! a sad realization, to be sure, but probably not wholly unexpected!!
- i am so grateful for cell phones and texting! while in the hospital for an extended length of time, having a connection to the outside world is crucial to ones sanity! (i think i was talking to my dad in the above picture)
- visits from our girls always brightened my day. i looked forward every week to sunday when mitch and the girls come to visit me.
- when mitch calls and asks if i want him to bring mae mae or if he should leave her at barbmom’s for their sunday visit, always tell him to bring her because when he shows up without her you will regret it and be sad!
- even though mae mae is into everything and wants to climb all over me it is still better when she is visiting! it causes a lot more stress, but it is so worth seeing her excitement at seeing me!!
- the hospital has great juice and cool straws (the little red coffee stir straws) because the girls ALWAYS have to get some while they are here.
- the nurses love our girls!
- showering every three days makes for very greasy hair on the last day!
- i have not fixed my hair or worn make-up for 5 weeks straight!
- laying around in bed all day makes you always look tired with puffy eyes!
- my legs have gotten really hairy with only one electric shaving the whole 5 weeks i’ve been here, thanks to nurse kim for the grooming!
- it’s easy to become friends with your nurses when you get the same nurses several times a week!!
- apparently, not all patients are happy and nice. i have been called “the nice patient who doesn’t ever need anything” and “the happy, positive patient”!
- nurses really like nice, friendly patients!!
- i love the art work on my whiteboard. nani and kale’a drew these for me when they came for a visit. i love the babies that nani drew. they are so cute and tiny! the nurses love the babies, too! i love the cheery bright colors that kale’a put up for me to look at everyday!
- when you’re in the hospital, unable to see your family daily, it is VERY important to have a picture of them close by so you can look at them!
- i stare at this picture on my wall A LOT everyday!!! and, without fail, it always makes me smile!
- i REALLY miss my husband!
- the longer i lay in a hospital bed the more my body starts to ache ALL OVER! the last few nights have been especially difficult! no matter what side i sleep on my shoulder or my elbows, or my hip or my knee, or my back screams out at me in protest!
- nighttime is especially lonely!
- when i’m alone, in the dark, trying to sleep is when my mind runs wild. nighttime is when i worry the most about every little contraction, or twinge in my cervix.
- the hospital dietary needs a bigger variety for long-term patients! i mean, REALLY!!
- getting dressed in your clothes everyday makes me feel much better. i think i wore a hospital gown for the first 2 maybe 2 1/2 weeks before my doctor told me i didn’t have to wear the hospital gown, but could wear my own clothes!!
- free wi-fi totally ROCKS!!
- when you lay in bed all day except to get up to go potty, your muscles get REALLY weak! it doesn’t help that i am lugging around two 6 pound babies, either!
- my belly is heavy to carry around!
- mechanical beds are a lifesaver! it’s much easier to get out of bed!
- even though my bed is a tempurpedic, my body still gets sore, just not as quickly as it would if it wasn’t a tempurpedic!
- i would have died without the fan they gave me from labor and delivery. the nurses like my room because it is “so fresh” and cool.
- it’s a strange thing to look out my window everyday and see sunshine, especially now that everyone is talking about how cold it is. i look out and it looks exactly the same as the day i came in, so i just assume it is still warm.
- one of the greatest things i love to hear from the nurses or doctors is, “the boys are looking great!!” music to my ears!
- the other thing i love to hear is, “they are both head down!”
- twin boys move A LOT!! i look at my belly and it is crazy to see it move so much!!
- even with good veins i.v.’s are never fun to get started. my veins seem to roll out of the way when the nurses are trying to get a new iv line in. twice i have been stuck in 4 different places before they actually got it in. the frustrating thing is that they haven’t used the i.v. since i was admitted 4 weeks ago!!
- i.v.’s in the hand suck!!
- a good i.v. is worth it’s weight in gold! i have had this one stay good since the 9th of november!
- getting woken up in the middle of the night from a dead sleep to take your medicine is not fun! they wake me at midnight and 6 am every day!
the most important observations that i have made are these:
- miracles happen!
- prayers are answered!
- a good ward family is an amazing thing!
- marrying mitch was the BEST decision i EVER made, hands down!
- our girls are extraordinary!
- i don’t know how we could have gotten through this without the gospel or our knowledge and faith in our Savior Jesus Christ and our loving Father in Heaven! SERIOUSLY!
- i know our Heavenly Father is mindful of us and He loves our family because he gave us this trial so we could be made stronger. and i believe that we have been made stronger individually and as a family!
- faith can bring about marvelous things!
- these boys are going to be a huge blessing to our family!
Thursday, November 18, 2010
one of the girls favorite things is when mitch gets hungry for “belly pie”! anytime he sees a bare belly he just has to get him some belly pie! so, he chases the girls around the house and pins them down to eat their bare belly pie, all the while the girls are screaming and laughing and wriggling around trying to break free of his belly pie frenzy! i love to watch it! lately even, mahea has been lifting her shirts up to expose her bare belly to mitch tempting him to eat some! of course, he does and she loves it!! it is so adorable!
since i have been in the hospital, i have not taken any belly pictures. so, last wednesday when mitch surprised me with a sleepover in my hospital room i had him snap some pictures. then again on sunday i had him take some more.
so, here is my belly (comparison to last photo taken):
27 weeks + 2 days 33 weeks
and here is my “belly pie”:
lately, when i get a nurse that had helped me a week or two earlier they see me and they all say, “wow! you have grown!!” i guess the growth is more obvious when you’re not around it everyday. i can tell whenever i get up to go potty that my belly seems to be getting heavier and heavier! it’s a good thing, though!! that’s why i am still in the hospital, to grow these babies!
i am happy to report, also, that, according to my nurses, i still don’t have any stretch marks on my belly pie!! of course, i am just going on their word because i can’t see the underside of my belly!! :o)
here is another picture (very unflattering) of my belly from the front. i was brushing my teeth and trying to sit in a semi-reclined position when mitch snapped this shot. since i know you all are just dying to know where i have been living the last 4 weeks, you can also get a glimpse of my
luxury hotel hospital accommodations. i even labeled things for you, cuz’ i’m nice like that:
the hospital has the most awesome ice chips! i know, weird, but it is so true!! let me tell you that i am so grateful for free wi-fi and my macbook! these two things have been a lifesaver! i have been able to finish my christmas shopping, blog, facebook, chat, skype every night with my kids and mitch, listen to music, watch movies, edit photos, make a photo calendar, and i’m even working on getting a christmas card out this year (something i haven’t done for ages!!). so, if you want a card from yours truly, which just might include a baby announcement with two cute mason boys, send me an email with your address to firstname.lastname@example.org, even if you think i have your address please send me an email anyway, just in case!
so, if you are wondering what the “SCD” tubes are, i will tell you because i didn’t know what they were 4 weeks ago, either. i have been wearing these since the first day i was admitted to the hospital in preterm labor. being that i am on bed rest and use my legs very little my risk of forming a blood clot in my legs is increased. these little SCD’s are like a little massage for my calves. i wear these lovely white knee high wraps on my legs. then, i plug the tubes into the leggings and turn the machine on. there are three chambers in the leggings, one above the next and the machine pumps air into each chamber starting at the ankle moving up to just below the knee. then it lets the air out. it does this about every 30 seconds all day and all night! so far, it has worked and i am clot free!! i don’t mind it so much, it feels like a massage. the only annoying thing is when i am trying to sleep at night my legs sometimes get a bit tangled in the tubes! that’s a small price to pay for clot free and varicose vein free legs!!
today, i am 34 weeks + 1 day and they will send me home the day before thanksgiving!! i’ve got 6 days left! they will take me off the medication and just let nature take it’s course. mitch thinks i will have them sooner rather than later (like within days or hours of being released) and i keep teasing that i will probably have to be induced 3 weeks after i get home. i hope mitch is right, though, this time!
i had an ultrasound today and found out that both babies are still head down. they measured them, too, and they both weigh approximately 5 pounds 13 ounces! which is awesome!! still measuring about a week+ bigger than gestational age. three weeks ago when they measured them baby a was 4 pounds 12 ounces and baby b was 4 pounds 4 ounces which was 2 1/2 weeks and 2 weeks bigger than gestational age.
our family is surviving this really well! i am amazed at how the girls have handled this! our family is being made stronger through this trial and i can see everyone’s faith growing as we put our trust in our Heavenly Father. i know we don’t ever want to go through trials, but i can honestly say that i am grateful that our Heavenly Father saw fit to give us this trial!! i know He loves us and He has trusted us to make it through this together and to come out stronger for it!
Sunday, November 14, 2010
i was just talking to my dad on the phone and we were talking about our girls. he was asking how they were doing through this whole ordeal and i told him that they are doing surprisingly well! unless everyone is telling me what they think i want to hear and not the truth, the word is that they are still very sweet and good when they are being watched by all of the amazing people in our ward.
i’ll admit that they are doing better than i expected they would. i’ve seen other families go through separations similar to ours and the kids seem to start breaking down after about a week. they start acting out or become grumpy, withdrawn, or sad and manifest it through bad behavior. like i said, unless people are not giving me a truthful picture, then our girls are doing incredibly well!
so, i was talking to my dad about all of this and then we started talking about how well our girls get along. we really have been blessed with girls that are good friends that watch out for each other! sure, they have there moments, but for the most part they are great friends. they love to play together and imagine up games that include all the sisters.
just yesterday while i was talking to mitch on the phone, i could hear the girls screaming in delight and laughing in the background. apparently, they were playing a game of hide and seek that involved all 4 girls. mahea would just follow the seeker around and as soon as they found someone she would squeal in delight!! it was music to my ears and i couldn’t help but smile!!
anyway, while talking with my dad about how well the girls get along i said, “i think a lot of it has to do with nani. she is so sweet and thoughtful. she watches over her sisters and takes care of them. even when kale’a is getting in trouble she will defend her! being the oldest she is setting that example for her sisters” this, of course, was no surprise to my dad and he said, “i know, you can see it in her eyes, her kind, sweet countenance! she is the glue! i can’t think of a better way to put it, but she holds everything together!”
i’d never thought of it that way, but that is exactly who she is! she is the glue of the family! i love this picture of nani holding her sisters hand on a hike we took two summers ago. she was caring for kawena and making sure she got safely through the water without falling or getting hurt. this picture says so much about who nani is. she is a protector and a leader amongst her sisters.
nani has a genuine concern for others. i remember last year at the end of the school year i was talking with one of nani’s teachers. she told me that nani has a very caring heart. several times throughout the year she would inquire about the well-being of a fellow student who had gotten hurt because she was concerned for them. this was not just a one time thing, anytime one of the students in her class got hurt or sick and was not in class she would ask the teacher how they were doing. nani was given a heart of compassion for others and her peers are drawn to her because of her kindness and caring.
since my last post, nani has come to visit me twice in the hospital! the first time was last monday and being a school night we pretty much spent most of the time doing her homework that was due the next day. even though we were doing homework and not playing games and coloring, like i did with her sisters, we still had a great time. maybe that was because she had just a little bit of math and the rest was creative writing stuff.
nani is a very creative person. for as long as i can remember, whenever she has been asked what she wants to be when she grows up it is always something that involves art and creativity. the first thing she wanted to be, many years ago, was a photographer. now, if you ask her she will tell you that she wants to be an author and illustrator! she has already written several stories and loves to draw and create!
so, here in my little hospital room, laying in my bed together we imagined up a story about a cheetah that walked into her school’s library and began reading books. once we finished that story, we wrote a free verse poem about babies, about how they are sweet and sometimes stinky, how they are soft and cuddly, how sometimes they just cry and cry, but most importantly how much we love babies! it was fun to be creative with my author/illustrator daughter!!
her second visit was yesterday. she really wanted to watch saturday cartoons because “we don’t have cartoons at home”!! so, we watched a little bit of them while she showed me how to make bracelets out of yarn. then, i taught her how to play solitaire, which she picked up quickly and enjoyed, we never did win, though! after that, she told me that she wanted to do homework and i thought, “really?” so, again we did homework… the creative kind!
i wasn’t completely shocked that nani wanted to do homework. she is a very responsible girl. there have been many mornings where she has asked mitch to wake her up early so she could finish her homework that she didn’t have time to finish the night before. she is just like that. she may have inherited some of my perfectionistic tendencies??? whatever it is, she sets a high standard for herself and most of the time she reaches it of her own doing!! though it was homework we did, we were still laughing and having a great time just being together.
i love my nani girl! she is super helpful at home. being our first child and the oldest, there is a lot more responsibility placed on her. sometimes she doesn’t think it is fair, but she still is my little helper and does so much around the house to help… especially since i have gotten so big and was having a hard time doing everything i used to do! i know that she will be such a blessing when these boys join our family.
noelani, her given name, in hawaiian means “heavenly mist”. mist is soft, and gentle, it is not harsh, but subtle. mist can make light visible. that is our nani. she has a gentle sweetness about her and she shines her light for all to see!
i loved having nani with me in my hospital room, just her and i. i think that in bigger families you miss out on a lot of the one-on-one time, but when you are given a chance to have some you realize what a blessing it is. while she was with me i paid close attention to who nani is. i listened and i watched as she talked to me and as we worked together. i felt so strongly the sweetness of her spirit in this room. i know that she is a daughter of God and He loves her so much, just as she loves Him. i could feel it as i lay next to her. she has such a desire for righteousness and a hunger for truth and light. i watched this daughter of mine and i was so grateful that she came to our family. she blesses our family everyday! she is “the glue”, as my dad said, that holds our family together with such strength,… and i am proud to be her mother!
Sunday, November 07, 2010
whenever i look at pictures of our second daughter i am always captivated by her eyes! she was blessed with these light brown eyes edged with black. if that wasn’t enough she was also blessed with these dark, long, thick lashes! when she speaks to me i am always drawn to those eyes. since she was a toddler her eyes have always been animated and full of life. she communicates a lot through those eyes.
kale’a, in the hawaiian language means “delightful one” and we were right to give her this name. this second child of ours is a delightful girl! she is spirited, she is thoughtful, she cares for her sisters and for those around her! she hungers for acceptance and love from her family and she enjoys being with us. she is a leader with a great imagination. she laughs easily and makes those around her laugh. she is super creative and full of all sorts of fun ideas. she is crazy fun and she is super silly. she is smart and she loves her Savior. she is a monkey that loves to climb up everything, higher than i wish she would, i might add. she climbs trees, she climbs the walls in our house, she climbs up anything and everything!
i don’t think it is a secret that she and i clash more than i’d like. kale’a is a very strong-willed girl. she is stubborn, as am i. this, of course is never a good combination! we have struggled a lot together! it is not something that i am proud of, but it is something that i am very aware of and something that i have been trying to overcome.
though we have struggled with this, kale’a seems to be drawn to her mommy! it seems so strange to me that though we argue and fight often, she still has so much love for me. i would think it would have pushed us further apart, but most of the time she prefers me over anyone else! she demonstrates so perfectly the unconditional love of a child!
since i have been in the hospital she is the one who calls me everyday! i can almost count on my cell phone ringing everyday between 3:00 and 4:00 when the girls get home from school. i know that when i pick it up i will hear kale’a’s sweet voice saying, “hi, mama!” i’ve begun to look forward to the daily phone call from this girl of mine when i can hear her voice and i can talk to her about her day. it puts joy in my heart that she needs to call her mommy daily!
honestly, i think this separation between kale’a and i has been a good thing. we are not constantly battling anymore. we have been removed from our daily contention and in that space we have been able to draw closer together and feel the spirit. it is interesting to me how our Heavenly Father works. this trial may not have anything to do with the boys, but it could have everything to do with the relationships within our family. i might be wrong and i may never know in this lifetime, but for right now i can’t help but notice how peaceful the relationship between kale’a and i has become in the short two and a half weeks that i have been in the hospital!
yesterday morning, kale’a was dropped off at the hospital to spend two hours with me. just like her sister before her, she packed a bag with books to read and games for us to play together. when she walked into my hospital room she was trying to hide her excitement, but i could see it behind her giddy little smile! it made my heart soar to see my delightful kale’a so happy to be with her mommy!
she hopped up into my hospital bed with me and we began to play “hiss”, a game where you make snakes by matching up color cards. we were limited by the tiny space of my bedside table, but we managed just fine. after that, we played a teeny tiny game of “trouble” which was located on the end of her pen that was given to her by a friend. we played some with her legos and then the nurse came in to monitor the boys.
as she was hooking me up, kale’a began to help the nurse get things put together and was such a big help! kale’a is always quick to help others, another wonderful quality of this sweet girl. since i had to lay fairly still while being monitored we turned on the tv and watched an episode of the magic school bus.
i loved laying next to this daughter that i have struggled with in so many ways and hearing her unbridled laughter. i loved that when i started tickling/scratching her back that she turned her back to me and lifted up her shirt so she could feel it better – that she would shift to the other side and tell me where she wanted me to tickle next. this is one of the things that she asks me to do all the time. she loves the touch of my nails on her skin – i think it is a way for her to relax and feel close to me.
as i lay there next to kale’a, i wished that we could just stay like this forever, cuddled together in the peace and calm that surrounded us! no contention and no frustrations, just peace and calm and the spirit! for kale’a and i, i feel, that this is what this trial is all about.
i love this delightful child of mine! she pushes me to my limit and makes my life uncomfortable at times, but that is what we all need if we are to become better people, if we are to become like our Father in Heaven. i love talking with her and seeing those beautiful, expressive eyes that tell me more than her words do. i love her zest for life and her strong will!
and today i am so grateful for the morning that i spent with her in my hospital room, just the two of us playing, laughing, and just being together. i love this girl more than ever!
Friday, November 05, 2010
this kid has my heart 110%!! she is such a joy to be around and at such a fun age! her happiness and love for life is contagious! she is bright and funny and smart! she is sneaky and clever! she is so full of love and so lovable! she thinks of others, especially her sisters! she loves her sisters, she loves her daddy, and she loves her mommy! she loves to sing and she loves to dance:
i think this is because she has such a free spirit! and i love it! she is so much of what i wasn’t at her age! she can make friends instantly and calls everyone her best friend. she just makes it easy to love her! she loves to laugh and have fun!
it is her love for life and her energy that i have been especially missing this week! since school started, she and i have become good buddies and i’ve been missing my little buddy, a lot!
she seemed to be struggling a little bit this week, so mitch suggested that she come visit me in the hospital. just kawena and i for a few hours! i thought it was an awesome idea!
there was no preschool today, so today was our day!! mitch packed her a bag with coloring books, crayons, books, and games to fill our time together. our neighbor and good friend, erin, drove her to the hospital, dropped her off and then went to run some errands.
we had such a fun time. kawena climbed into bed with me and we started by reading the books. once we finished those kawena wanted to play some games. so, we played 2 games of candyland (i won the first game and she won the second), and then we played operation. it was so cute because every time she touched the metal side with her tweezers it always made her jump a little and she’d scream! she kept saying, with a giggle, “the buzzing scares me!” we were awesome surgeons!!
for the rest of the time until erin was finished with her errands, we colored in her coloring book! we helped each other pick just the right colors for our pictures and they were so beautiful when we were finished!
it was a wonderful morning! we didn’t do anything extraordinary, just the simple everyday things a mother does with her child, but it was the highlight of my week! i was able to get my kawena fix. i can’t hang out with my little buddy everyday right now, so for this short blip in our long life together i will be grateful for these moments! i will cherish having her warm little body cuddled next to mine in my hospital bed while i helped her brothers grow.
as she was getting ready to leave she got close to me and whispered, “mommy, i want you to come home with me right now.” i told her that i wanted to go too and explained to her why i could not. then, like someone much older than her 4 year old self, she accepted it, gave me a big hug and a kiss, and said, “I LOVE YOU!!” and with a content smile on her sweet little face she walked out of my hospital room!
like i said, she is so easy to love!!
Wednesday, November 03, 2010
well, it’s been a long time since i last posted. since then i have grown quite a bit in the belly area, but unfortunately do not have any pictures of it. i kept planning on taking another photo, specifically on the day i was 30 weeks. obviously, i didn’t snap that photo, and i regret it because the following day i landed myself in the hospital totally unexpectedly!!
here’s what happened:
thursday, october 21st (30 weeks + 1 day) i went to my regularly scheduled perinatologist appointment to have an “ffn” (fetal fiber nectin, a test that will tell us if i will go into labor in the next 10 days to 2 weeks), to check my cervical length (not dilation), and to monitor the boys. totally routine for a twin pregnancy at 30 weeks.
as i watched the monitor while they measured the length of my cervix i noticed the numbers on the screen. my heart sank because i knew it was bad! two weeks prior at my previous appointment my cervical length was 3.3 which was fine. they had told me that as long as i am above 2.5 there are no worries, but if the cervix ever shortened to 2.5 they would become concerned that the babies are coming soon.
in order to get an accurate number they measure the cervical length several times. as i watched, i saw numbers like 1.7, 1.3, 1.5. so, they called the doctor in to talk with me. he tells me that they are concerned that my cervix has shortened significantly and past the point of concern. they want to monitor my contractions (i hadn’t been having any painful contractions, just braxton hicks type tightening, for months, which is totally normal for me!) and check my cervix for dilation. after that fun exam they told me i was dilated to a 1 and they were sending me directly to the hospital.
as i drove myself to the hospital, somewhat shocked, i call my friend who is watching my other children and mitch to break the news to them. the rest of the afternoon and the next day was filled with blood draws and monitoring, iv’s with nasty medicines like magnesium to slow the contraction (which give me major weird hot flashes in my hands and ears and eyeballs) and shots of steroids to mature the boys lungs.
they kept me in the hospital for 4 days totally expecting me to have these babies. by sunday, they realized that the contractions were under control, but not stopped. they had taken me off of the magnesium drip and given me a medicine that i could take at home to relax the uterus. they checked my cervix again and i was still at a 1, no change was good! so, they sent me home with a prescription and orders for strict bed rest and instructions to only get out of bed to go potty and to shower every other day. they told me to call on monday to my ob to schedule a follow-up appointment for that week.
i got all settled at home, had a minor breakdown when i saw the kids and then pulled myself back together and resigned myself to spending the duration of my pregnancy laid up in my bed. i was extremely good about my
sentence instructions. mitch made very sure that i was obedient to the doctors orders.
on tuesday, october 26th, 2 days after my release, i went to my follow-up appointment and it happened again. after checking for dilation my ob sent me back to the hospital!! in those short 2 days i had dilated from a 1 to 3.5, without any painful contractions! as i left the office on my way back to the hospital, my doctor said, “don’t schedule an appointment on your way out because i won’t be seeing you in the office again while you’re pregnant!” i was so bummed!
so, it has been 8 days since my second admittance to the hospital. things are still under control. i am given my “control the contractions” medicine every 6 hours and monitored for contractions and listen to the boys heartbeats twice a day. i am able to get out of bed to go potty and shower every 3 days. i eat hospital food 4 times a day, and lay around in a hospital gown. i watch re-runs, read books, nap, write thank you notes, talk to friends and family, enjoy visitors, skype my kids and husband daily, and miss them every moment they’re not with me. i’m getting to know the nurses really well and am starting to settle into my new life. and now we just wait…
the boys are sounding great on the monitors and growing like crazy. the doctor said that if i make it to 35 weeks (3 more weeks, the day before thanksgiving) they could send me home to go into labor on my own. however, they are shocked that i am still pregnant now! i get the feeling that they think i won’t make it that far! i don’t know that i share their skepticism and i hope to prove them wrong! hey, we’ve done it once before when the doctors and midwives said my complete placenta previa with mahea would not move and i would have to have a c-section! it moved and i didn’t have a c-section. we have a way of surprising the medical community, so i say “why can’t we do it now?!!”
these are the ones i miss every hour of every day:
this picture is hanging on my wall in my hospital room so i can look at them whenever i want or need to!
things that i have missed while in the hospital: kale’a’s 7th birthday party, halloween (the girls did come to the hospital dressed in their costumes, though).
Friday, October 01, 2010
21 weeks 27 weeks + 2 days (sorry about the creepy look!)
wow! in a short 6 weeks i went from that…………………….. to this! holy cow!! no wonder i am feeling SO BIG!
HAH!…… and i thought i was big at 21 weeks! what did i know??!
i am soooo behind on blog posts right now, …swimming on labor day; 1st day of preschool for kawena; my awesome, amazing trip to oregon, to name a few. but this is the easiest, shortest (least time/energy consuming) post i could do! so there you have it.
i am trying to muster up the energy, somewhere (don’t know where to find it these days), to sit down and write all these posts. i can’t promise anything, but maybe, just maybe, i’ll find it in me to do some blog posts!
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
21 weeks 22 weeks + 5 days
23 weeks + 4 days
i asked mitch if he would take my picture last time i did a belly pic and he said, “can you at least smile and look at the camera, all the other pictures look like mug shots!” that was sweet of him wasn’t it? so, i looked and smiled this time! lovely, isn’t it? when i saw the picture i remembered why i don’t like to look, ….the neck fat rolls! so attractive, right!? i think i like the mug shots better!
so, i am beginning to fill out in my belly! i haven’t taken one this week, yet (26 weeks), but i will because i think i have reached the point where i have never been this big! right before getting in the shower tonight i looked in the mirror at my bare belly and my jaw dropped! i didn’t think it was possible for my skin to stretch that much and my belly to look that big! i had to go show mitch how big it was! i couldn’t believe it!
boy am i in for a huge shock over the next few months!!
Saturday, September 11, 2010
on friday i was down to just one child. so, mahea and i went out to run some errands. one of our stops was payless shoes. i never imagined that a stop at the shoe store would make a 20 month old SOOOO happy! this girl was in heaven!
for the past several months mae mae has been obsessed with shoes. we have a closet in our hallway that has 4 boxes for shoes, one for each girl. anytime the door is left open we will find mae mae in there saying “shu, shu” as she grabs shoes and puts them on. it is the bain of my existence at the moment because i find random shoes spread all over the house. i am having a difficult time bending down to pick things up off of the floor so you can imagine how much i dislike finding shoes all over the place.
as much of an annoyance that it is, i love to see mae mae walking/running through the house with mismatched shoes. most of the time they aren’t even her own shoes she’s running around in!
shoes just make her so happy right now.
so, we got to the store and i took her out of the stroller and she was in shoe heaven! she couldn’t try all the shoes on fast enough. she would pull a pair off of the shelf, hand them to me, and i would put them on her feet, but she was already onto the next pair! when she had tried on all of the shoes from her size she moved up to the bigger sizes. then she got picky. i would choose a pair from up on a shelf that she couldn’t reach and she would shake her head no and push them away!
we still had a few other places to go before we picked kawena up from preschool, so we put the shoes away, made our selection, and tried to head out the door. key word “tried”! mae mae threw the biggest toddler fit because she didn’t want to leave! the stinker was NOT done with all of the shoes and was NOT ready to leave her shoe heaven!
thank goodness for strollers that have straps that she can’t undo. i forced her down into the stroller kicking and screaming and calmly pushed her out of the store! thank goodness she gets over things quickly!
Wednesday, September 08, 2010
friday, september 3rd, 2010 started off just like any other day. i woke up slowly, secretly wishing that the girls could just get themselves ready for school and out the door without my help so i could stay in bed. after laughing at myself for even thinking it, i grabbed my compression knee highs and struggled around my belly to laboriously pull them up onto my tired legs. i swung my feet off of the bed and planted my hands behind me anticipating the heave to push my heavy body onto my feet, when the bedroom door opened.
i looked up expecting one of my children, sleepy eyed with ratty haired to ask me why i hadn’t woken them up yet. instead, my amazing husband walks in and says, “get back into bed!” in his playful “what are you thinking” tone of voice! a bit confused, i obeyed (but let’s face it, it doesn’t take much these days for me to obediently “get back in bed” when told to!!)
he then brings me a breakfast in bed tray complete with fresh fruit smoothie, bagel with peanut butter, and scrambled eggs. oh, but that is not all that is on the tray. laid across the top of the tray is a single white rose and a green envelop with my name printed on it.
as he was walking in the room carrying this labor of love i was thinking, “what day is it? did i forget something?” which isn’t unlikely in my pregnant state, in fact it is VERY probable that i would forget something, something even very important. i’m only speaking from experience here! but as much as i strained my brain, nothing was coming to mind. nothing was coming to mind because it was just an ordinary date on the calendar! no birthday, no anniversary, nothing! just a desire to spoil the woman he loves and adores! i know! how did i get so lucky, right?
i looked at my handsome husband with a sideways glance, full of mystery and a slight smile, as i opened the envelop. this is what i read:
Mahina’s to do list
September 3, 2010
- 7:00am Breakfast in Bed
- 8:00am Swim laps
- 9:00am prenatal massage with Aleen
i was shocked! i think i said something like, “really?” then, he left me in peace to enjoy my breakfast while he set himself to the task of getting the girls off to school. as i ate my delicious feast alone in my quiet bedroom, i was in awe of what just happened. the amazing thing is that the night before as i climbed into bed i was thinking to myself, “i really need a massage, my back is killing me!” little did i know what had been planned for me this morning!
just as i was finishing up my delicious breakfast, in walked mitch ready to shower me with even more than he already had. he tells me that he has something else for me and pulls out this:
- a new maternity speedo
- a swiMP3 player for listening to music while doing laps at the pool
- a heart rate monitor/triathlon watch with gps (tells you distance, cadence, speed, etc for swimming, biking, and running)
again, the amazing thing was that two nights previous to this i had been looking online for a maternity speedo. they were all pretty ugly, and there weren’t many options. this one was the best of the bunch and i had decided that i would order this very same suit that mitch had just handed to me!
i was seriously floored! but he didn’t give me time to dwell on it. he hurried me out of bed to get ready to go to the gym for my lap swim and prenatal massage. a few minutes later he comes in with a gym bag that he had already packed with everything i would need to get ready for the day. the only thing he said was, “don’t look in the bag until you get to the gym.”
when i was ready to go, i said goodbye to everyone, but mitch stopped me and said, “wait, i’ll take you and drop you off!” so, as soon as the girls were out the door to school we loaded up the two youngers and we were off to the gym. i asked him what he was going to do about work and he said, “i’ll just go in later.”
after a quick swim, i met the aleen at the front desk of the club and she took me to the massage room. as soon as she closed the door she said, “your husband leave this for you” and indicated another green envelop addressed to me with a single red rose. shocked, yet again, i slowly pick it up and read the contents:
the top of the note was the same as the previous note, but 7:00am thru 9:00am were checked off and the next two lines read:
- 10:00 Shower
- 10:30 Brunch with Jessica at the Grove cafe & market (Jessica to pick up at gym)
i couldn’t believe it! from the moment this all began i had been thinking, “how did i get so lucky, to not only find this man, but to earn his love and affection?” as i laid there under the amazing hands of this massage therapist, (seriously the best massage i have EVER had) i couldn’t help but smile at my good fortune! i am in awe everyday of this man that i gave my heart to over ten years ago.
after the massage, i quickly showered and got ready for my lunch date with my friend jessica. after showering, i opened up the gym bag that mitch had packed and had implored me not to open until at the gym to find this:
all new, all picked by mitch, all totally cute, and all the EXACT RIGHT SIZE! it was scary how perfectly EVERYTHING fit! i don’t even get that lucky when buying clothes for myself!! i tell ya, A.M.A.Z.I.N.G!
when jessica walked in to get me she was carrying, can you guess????? of course, a rose, white this time, with another envelop! you’re beginning to catch on!!
upon opening it this is what i read:
again the top was the same as the previous notes with everything checked off except the new “thing to do”:
- 12:00pm Nap
how sweet is that? he knows how much i NEED my daily nap. he knows that if don’t get it i am grumpy by dinner time and no fun to be around. so he worked it into my day!
jessica and i enjoyed a yummy lunch downtown. i had the best b.l.t on toasted wheat bread that i’ve ever had! it had guacamole on it, something i hadn’t tried on a b.l.t before. super good! you should try it!
after a great lunch and even better company, jessica dropped me off at home where mitch had been watching her daughter so she could take me to lunch! mitch rushed me off to our bed to take my nap. upon entering the room this is what greeted my eyes:
and this is what was inside the envelop:
same thing as previous notes with this added:
- 2:00 Hair cut, style, make-up, Manicure and Pedicure at La Bella Salon and Spa
okay, another amazing thing about this part of my day is that i have needed a haircut for ages! the previous week i had called a salon to make a hair appointment, but i had called after they had closed. so, i was supposed to call back during the week and schedule my appointment, but life got hectic and i never did.
not only that, but i had painted my toes back in july and the paint was coming off and i really needed to get it off. there was one big problem, though! i couldn’t reach my toes to get the old paint off or to get new paint on once the old stuff was off! i had been talking to my mom the day before and she told me that i needed to go get a pedicure and some pampering. i had decided i would do just that!
all day i just kept thinking, “how did he know that i was going to make an appointment for this? how did he know this was exactly what i needed?” i love when things work out so perfectly! it reminded me of the allison krauss song, “when you say nothing at all”. this song has always been a favorite of ours because it is so us! (song 44 on my playlist if you want to listen).
i laid down for my “nap”, but it became evident that it would only be a “rest”. i don’t know if it was all of the excitement or my complete wonder at all that was going on, but i could not for the life of me doze off! but it was alright with me! i felt refreshed after resting and ready for the next portion of my secret adventure.
the only downfall of the whole morning is that i didn’t realize what a big day this was going to be. up to this point i hadn’t had my camera with me. i wish i would have known that i would have wanted to capture all of this on film. seriously, this was quickly turning into a day that i NEVER wanted to forget and i didn’t even know that the best was yet to come!
before i left for the spa, i made sure to put my camera in my purse. i have to admit, unfortunately, that i was so overwhelmed by every new thing that i forgot to snap pictures of most of it! on my drive to the salon i decided i would get a before and after of my hair and make-up, but once there i totally spaced it and didn’t take, but one picture! lame, i know!
when i got to the reception area at the salon they asked for my name. when i told them they said, “oh, this is for you!” and handed me yet another white rose with another green envelop:
added to the previous “Mahina’s things to do” list was this:
- 5:30 Back home to get ready for a night out
for the next 3 1/2 hours i thoroughly enjoyed being pampering at the salon and spa. it was exactly what i needed! sadly, like i said, i only got one photo at the make-up table:
i got cute purple toes and a french manicure which i took pictures of after the fact once i got home:
aren’t the sandals that mitch gave me so cute?! i love that there is no heel on them. most of my shoes have some sort of a heel and they are killing me these days! he is so thoughtful that he took that into consideration when he picked these!
when i arrived home the house was empty. i figured mitch had just gone out to pick up the babysitter and would be back shortly. so, i went back to the bedroom to get ready for my night out to find this on the bed:
he had picked out my evening wear down to the very last detail. in fact, upon getting closer i noticed these laying on the dress:
i just about fell over from shock! these diamond earrings are gorgeous and HUGE! i couldn’t believe it! what more could he do to shock me! this whole day had been a dream to me! from the moment i woke up until this point it was pure pampering and it was ALL about ME! no special occasion, it was just because he LOVES ME and ADORES ME!
all day one phrase kept running through my brain, “how did i get so lucky?!” what did i do to deserve such a man!
the note that came with this get-up was this:
- 6:30 pick up for dinner
so, i got dressed, which was a bit of a struggle as my nails were still a bit damp. have you ever tried to put on stockings with newly painted fingernails? or attempted to screw on the backs of diamond earrings? how about zip up boots that are getting a wee bit tight around the calves? all while working around a huge belly? well, i can now say that i have and i wouldn’t recommend it!
but, with much effort, i got dressed and was ready when mitch arrived to pick me up. he was ALONE… no kids, no babysitter. in he walked carrying a white rose, a green envelop, and wearing a huge smile and pouring out words of adoration and love! and he looked HOT! i’m not talking sweaty hot, i’m talking hubba, hubba HOT!
the note he handed me said:
- 7:00 Dinner at Bien Shur restaurant with Mitch
he walked me out the front door to this:
yup, total complete shock, again, and i’m thinking, “what more can he do? does it ever end??” never in my life had i dreamed of a day like this! days like this don’t happen to little old me! these sorts of days are the ones you only read about in fictional books or watch in fictional movies, but never do you expect that it would happen for you in your REALITY life!
the restaurant was on the top floor of the sandia resort casino and had an amazing view of the city out one side and the mountains out the other side. we were seated just as the sun was beginning to set out the west side of the restaurant.
as soon as we were seated our waitress, who was absolutely wonderful, walked up to our table and said, “i believe this is for you.” handing me a red rose and an envelop. i looked at mitch with a mixture of unbelief and awe and just grinned from ear to ear!
i will not translate this one for you and, yes, the rose was strategically placed for a reason! this is a family friendly blog, you know! but this did explain the lack of children and a babysitter when mitch picked me up from the house. he had arranged for barbmom and papa clyde (mitch’s second parents) to have the kids overnight!
over dinner mitch asked me, “what would your ideal day be?” i thought for a moment and said that i had never really put much thought into it. as i thought about it more he said, “i knew that your ideal day would have to involve swimming.” then i said, “first of all, on my ideal day i would not be pregnant (at least not this big), but this day would pretty much cover my ideal day. i can’t think of anything else that would make it a better day!”
we ate way too much and i was hurting by the time we were finished, but it was so worth it! before our delicious desserts came the waitress came and asked us if this was a special occasion. mitch and i looked at each other and slowly shook our heads and replied “no.” but then we realized that it was actually our 10 year 9 month anniversary and we might as well be celebrating our 11th anniversary (dec. 3rd). we deicided that with our luck we would probably be in the hospital in labor on our actual anniversary!
our waitress was so sweet and she said, “well, i am just going to give you your desserts on us to help you celebrate!” then we indulged ourselves on crème Brule and frozen lemon mousse! again, i forgot to have the waitress take a picture of us! what kind of photographer am i anyway? i’ll blame my pregnancy brain! i’m kicking myself for not documenting this incredible day. that must be why i feel that i need to record this in such detail, now!
after dinner, mitch helped me waddle my way to our room:
if i had thought that he had gone above and beyond and that there was nothing more that he could possibly do, i was wrong! the best part of this whole experience was right through this door!
i walked in and saw this:
in total there were 4 dozen roses in various bouquets! the roses were UNBELIVABLY GORGEOUS! but as beautiful as they were they paled in comparison to what each arrangement symbolizes!
My Eternal Friend Bouquet
on this card he told me that the yellow roses with the red tips symbolizes our friendship. he told me that i truly am his best friend and the red tips symbolizes how he loves me more with each day.
My Eternal Bride Bouquet
in this card he explained that the white roses represent my purity. he told me what an amazing bride i was and that i get more beautiful in every way with each passing day.
My Eternal Companion Bouquet
these red and white roses were the ones that he had given me throughout the day. on this card he explained that the red and white roses represent our unity. then, he went on to say that throughout the years we have become closer in so many ways. he longs to grow old together and cannot imagine spending eternity with anyone else but me!
My Eternal Lover Bouquet
um, i think i WON’T be telling you what this card said, … you know, family blog and all!!
at this point in my unbelievable (that is seriously what i was feeling. did this really happen? am i really sitting here with this incredible man? it was hard for me to believe what had been planned and carried out for ME) day, i was in awe of my husband. how did i get so lucky? how much time and effort and planning had been put into this one amazing day? and all of it was done without even a small indication or hint to me of what was being planned!
i thought back to all that had transpired in the past 15 hours and there were no words sufficient enough to express what i was feeling! it truly was an unforgettable, “fairy-tale-dream-come-true “kind of a day!
we slept in late and then awoke to this beautiful view from our room window. i love the sandia mountains in the background!:
before we went downstairs for some breakfast, mitch had one last surprise for me. obviously, he had packed our suitcase, but what i didn’t know is that he had one more new outfit that he had bought for me (well, i guess it would be more like one and a half outfits):
i love everything that he picked for me throughout this whole thing, which, if you knew our history with him buying clothes for me, is a tremendous feat! mitch hasn’t bought me clothes for a long time because he got frustrated watching me return clothes after clothes that either didn’t fit or that wasn’t quite what i was looking for, or that i thought was to expensive, or …you get the idea. but to my credit, you have to understand that i am a bit neurotic when it comes to buying things for me. i mean, i do the same thing with clothes that I purchase for MYSELF. it would not be uncommon to see me walking around with a shirt or pants that still has the tag on it just in case i decide i don’t like it! crazy, i know! but i digress…
so, like i said, the clothing was truly an accomplishment and just added to the incredible day!
i love this man! i love him more than i did on the day that i said “yes!” to his proposal, more than on the day that i married him and gave him my whole heart, more than on the day when our first child was born, more than i did yesterday! he is my best friend! he is my eternal companion! i will forever be his bride! he makes my heart go pitter patter with a glance of his blue eyes or a flash of his brilliant smile.
i can’t imagine loving him more, that my heart is capable of more love, but my heart never ceases to amaze me and neither does he!
i just read this on another blog,
“They say that a good marriage is the ability to fall in love over and over with the same person.”
according to this standard, i would have to say that we have a VERY good marriage!
seriously, how did i get so lucky??